Where has 2012 gone? | lucidblue's Blog
I just read the last few entries of my blog. It's been a while since I've written here. I haven't been here much, for many reasons. But sometimes I think there are still moments when I need to write and express myself.
A year ago I was in Prague for Christmas with my brother and his wife. I had many emotional moments - I was beginning my journey, my walk out of darkness into the light. I remember my last night in Prague. It was New Years Eve, and it was probably one of the darkest moments I had ever known. I shed so many tears that night.
And then there was my 4 month escape to Thailand, Malaysia, Singapore and Australia. I can't believe I've been home for 7 months now. That trip is only a memory now. I long for it again. I long for all those amazing moments...learning who I am. I can't even begin to express to anyone here how much I've grown and changed from those moments. To say I found my smile again doesn't even come close.
2012 was to be my year of change, and wow did I ever change. I am not the same girl I was a year ago, wandering the streets of Prague. I am not the same girl who was terrified for my first solo trip to Berlin where I would know no one. I am not the same girl who was terrified to face myself all alone in my journey. I faced her, and I grew to love her. In one swift moment, I learned who I was, and ironically realized I had always known. It seems so dumb to say that, but it couldn't be more true.
I wouldn't say my life is perfect. I'm still trying to figure some things out...but at least I know who I am. Now it's time to figure out what I want.
There's a part of me that wishes that we were going into the beginning of 2012 again....just so I could live those moments all over again. But I know I have to move forward, and continue to figure it out.
I'm going to miss my moments of 2012. It went by way too fast!
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Previous PostsWhere has 2012 gone?, posted December 19th, 2012
Next lesson learned, posted April 2nd, 2012
I'm starting to get it, posted March 23rd, 2012, 2 comments
Six weeks in, posted March 11th, 2012
New Years Eve in Prague, posted December 31st, 2011
I dare to dream, posted December 25th, 2011
Brave, posted December 20th, 2011, 1 comment
Surrounded by a moment of greatness..., posted December 18th, 2011, 1 comment
In our moments of sadness, posted December 7th, 2011
Heartbreaking....., posted December 5th, 2011
Forever Friends, posted November 14th, 2011
Finally!, posted November 4th, 2011, 2 comments
Understanding why I've fallen, posted October 31st, 2011
My struggle and my hope, posted October 25th, 2011
I never knew that I could actually think this, posted October 16th, 2011
The ache and pain of love, and yet, it's so blissful, posted September 12th, 2011
The Vancouver Riot - Rex's Point of View, posted June 17th, 2011, 2 comments
U2 360 - best show ever!, posted June 4th, 2011
The next step..., posted May 23rd, 2011, 3 comments
A year ago..., posted May 16th, 2011, 4 comments
My first 5km race, posted May 8th, 2011, 4 comments
Speaking my truth, posted May 1st, 2011, 2 comments
Tuesday became good, posted April 27th, 2011, 1 comment
It's ME in that book!, posted April 20th, 2011, 2 comments
Too young!, posted April 18th, 2011, 1 comment
Tuesday gone bad, posted April 13th, 2011, 4 comments
It's a risk..., posted March 31st, 2011
A Lucky Girl, posted March 29th, 2011
I want to hide, posted March 18th, 2011, 2 comments
Devastation, posted March 17th, 2011, 5 comments
When a movie proves that certain things just aren't reality, posted March 13th, 2011, 2 comments
0 for 5 and hitting the red 4 times!, posted March 5th, 2011
Best game of the season, and team camaraderie, posted February 27th, 2011, 2 comments
Tomorrow, he goes back home, posted February 24th, 2011
Perfect, posted February 14th, 2011, 3 comments
My Gratitude, posted February 13th, 2011, 1 comment
My Failings, posted February 12th, 2011, 3 comments
I ran my *** off tonight and it felt so damn good!, posted February 8th, 2011
I'm out of sorts, posted February 7th, 2011, 1 comment
He arrived last night, posted February 6th, 2011
My brother comes home..., posted February 5th, 2011, 1 comment
Embracing possibility, posted February 4th, 2011
Good people, posted January 30th, 2011, 2 comments
A journey toward healing, posted January 26th, 2011, 2 comments
Confused by the fact that the lines don't melt together, they are so defined..., posted January 24th, 2011
Please forgive me, my friends, posted January 23rd, 2011, 2 comments
I am numb beyond imagination, posted January 23rd, 2011
This is it..., posted January 16th, 2011, 4 comments
Two steps forward, one step back, posted January 11th, 2011, 2 comments
One Year....my special day, posted January 4th, 2011, 3 comments
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